Out of the ordinary

All of us on the editorial team of The Poppletonian are so fascinated by Off Piste, the fortnightly series in Times Higher Education in which academics step outside their area of expertise, that we've decided to introduce our own version. This week, Dr K.W. Trembling, Reader in the Department of Medieval Studies, describes his distinctive extramural obsession.

"Quite honestly, I'm completely crazy about Jordan. Have you seen her? Wow! When I first saw her on I'm a Celebrity ... Get Me out of Here! all I could think was that she was the most exciting woman I had ever seen and nothing that I've seen of her since has led me to change my mind and I wasn't the least bit surprised when she was voted into TV's 50 Sexiest Women of 2008 because she has all that gorgeous blonde hair and wonderful breasts and long brown legs and I was quite sad when she got together with that Peter Andre person but of course it now looks as though they've broken up so who knows I might still be in with a chance (some hope!). I think of Jordan all the time when I'm not engaged in pursuing my strategic research objectives."

Thanks for that, Dr Trembling. Next week, our Finance Director on his obsession with Spread Betting.

Can you hear me at the back?

"Size doesn't matter at Poppleton." That was our vice-chancellor's response to the news that students at Bristol and Manchester universities were raising concerns about the number of students being "packed" into lecture halls.

He said that although the First Year Lectures on Psychology for Business had been reconstituted as open-air rallies in the Science Park to accommodate the 743 students on the course, there was no evidence that this reduced the quality of the learning experience.

Such complaints as there had been about inadequate sight lines emanated from students who arrived late and had been allocated "overspill pedagogic placement" in a neighbouring wheat field.

He pointed out that all lecturers on this course now availed themselves of an elevated executive podium and were thoroughly trained in the latest megaphone techniques.

Thought for the Week

(contributed by Jennifer Doubleday, Head of Personal Development)

Soon it will be time to say goodbye to another year of students. Here's a lovely reminder that not all students are ungrateful for what you've done.

Thank you, skilful teacher, For teaching me to be A stronger, smarter person, Academically. Thank you for your caring And lots of other stuff; For all the things you gave me, I can't thank you enough.

lolsoc@dircon.co.uk.